Friday, June 17, 2011

I am shaved (and traumatised)

I am not pleased, not pleased at all. It all began this morning, when I awoke to discover my food bowl was empty. Not only that, but my water dish was also empty. The useless humans had failed to provide me with water. I woke the male human up so that I could air my grievances with him. He failed to refill my water bowl and he failed to provide me with breakfast. I mooed at him and the female human all morning - to no avail.
They eventually went out because I was merkling too much at them. When they returned, I was shoved into my carry case and dragged down to the vet. I don't mind the vet waiting room. it smells interesting and there are other animals to growl at. They are all scared of me. But then the humans took me into Dr. Inaba's room..... Dr. Inaba is a very nice man, but he is very, very scary. Last time I saw him, he stuck a needle in me. And the time before that, he stuck two needles in me. I went on the offensive. I used my biggest, fiercest growl. I launched myself at the side of my case in an attempt to reach Dr. Inaba and disable him. But the case held strong. I growled at the male and female humans. Traitors! Dr. Inaba told them they would put a cover over my case and gas me! The humans left. I was all alone....
I started to come around just as Dr. Inaba finished pulling a needle out of my neck. I felt a cold breeze on my neck and my pooka paws. I had been shaved! They shaved my back leg and then they shaved my front leg! But they couldn't find a vein, so they shaved a big chunk of fluff out of my neck! I feel naked.
The humans came back to get me and take me home. I was very angry at them. I growled and hissed and merkled at them. When I finally got home, the humans let me out and gave me lots of noms. I was a little unsteady on my feet, so the male human carried me to my noms. And I had had an accident, so the female human gave me a sponge bath. It's going to take more than that though until they're truly forgiven.

1 comment:

  1. Oh you poor little pooka! I imagine you will get lots of flakies soon to make up for it. The humans never take you to the vet to be mean you know, it's always for your own good. Don't be mean to the humans, they do it because they love you!

    Lila sends a headbutt and a knowing look. She says you are lucky you don't have the Cone of Shame. She didn't like that much because it made her head heavy.