I am horizontal

The female human is away. I am sad. But it does mean there is more space for me to pook out. I can pook out in bed on the female human's side. I can pook out on the sofa next to the radiator. I can pook out anywhere I please. The male human gets cross if I pook out on his chair, though.

I am drug-fuelled

I have nip?! Where is it?!


You, human, show me where my nip is!


Going...


Going....


Gone.


Hey, that's still my nip. No nip for you, human!


All mine.

I am gowned

Dressing-gowned, that is. It is getting very cold now in Hokkaido. The female human has a wonderful piece of winter clothing... the Dressing Gown. The Dressing Gown is a big, fluffy, canary-yellow, toasty piece of cuddle equipment. The female human likes to pick me up and bundle me up in the Dressing Gown. I quite like it too. It's soft and cozy.
I need to work out a plan to steal the Dressing Gown. If I can get the Dressing Gown all to myself, I can be the toastiest Pooka in the world. I know the female human goes out to work in the morning...

I am nipped

The male human has been doing lots of work recently. I don't like it when he does lots of work. It usually means I get less attention. I try to get the male human's attention by jumping on his chair, his table, his computer, his lap... I knock over his tea, bite his hand, scratch his chair... My techniques work for a little while, but then he goes back to his work and I have to start again.
But the male human has a secret weapon - catnip. I love nip. It makes me all happy and cuddly. The male human puts nip on my big fishy. It makes me crazy. I have to have the nip! I roll around with my fishy and nom it until I get all the nip out. Once I've had enough nip, I get all sleepy and cuddly. I like to have a little nap with my nip fishy. It makes me and the male human happy.

I am cheesed off

The male human made the female human cross. So now she's sulking at him. In an attempt to get her to speak to him again, the male human has been sending her 'amusing' photos of my furry self.
I am not amused. I don't see why I have to be dragged into their little tiffs. I'm the Pooka. It's nothing to do with me. I'm going to sit on the male human's computer keyboard to teach him a lesson. No one makes a mockery of Lord Puss-ma-tats...

I am bundled

The weather is turning very cold here. I don't like it. But at least it's not snowing yet. My paddy paws are getting cold. I go under the kotatsu all evening now.
Today I typed 'hotshot' on the male human's computer. He was very impressed, but he still didn't use it in his writings. He's so difficult to please.
In the mornings the humans let me get under the covers with them to warm up. I like our morning cuddles. They let me go in the middle where it's warmest. On Sundays we stay in bed for a long time.

Sometimes the humans get cross at me because I like to roll over and spread my legs out. When I stretch, I like to stretch all the way down to my claws. But the humans don't appreciate me scratching their backs for them. They're never happy, these humans.
The female human thinks it's funny to tuck the covers in up under my chin really tightly. Then she takes photos of me! I humour her for a little while, but then I get grumpy and bite the male human. He's tastier than the female human.

I am round

I don't like sitting on the floor in winter. It's cold. I don't like my belly to get cold. There's nowhere comfy to sit in the male human's writing room. Sometimes I jump on his desk, but he gets cross because I knock his tea over and sit on his computer. Yesterday I typed 'Brzzzzzzzzzzbop'. The male human thought it was funny, but didn't include it in his book. How rude!
The female human brought my bed in, so I would have somewhere comfortable to sit. But this bed is too small. I have to make myself very round to fit on it.
Yesterday a box arrived for the humans. It's a very big box and much more comfortable than my bed. The female human said she would make it pretty for me. She's not so bad all of the time.